He is an equal opportunity slut.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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