we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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