I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
