you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
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