Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
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