jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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