"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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