This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Just cropdusted the office
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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