oh god the rape fog is back!
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize