Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
