hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
