My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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