Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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