i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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