We should be called the Road Head Warriors
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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