My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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