i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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