I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
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