he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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