bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize