Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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