Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
