Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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