Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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