Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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