next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
