He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Randomize
