What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Randomize