the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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