Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
