You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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