I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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