..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Reggie can tackle my bush.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
