I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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