omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Randomize