I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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