did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
