We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
