so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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