So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
