yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
