Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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