Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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