I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I'm at about main and main street
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Randomize