Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Drunk walkin through police station. America
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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