she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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