He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
we're so committed to being not committed
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