im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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