'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
do herpes really smell.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
