his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
