Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I need water and some morals
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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